Vision

I was feeling poetic at work today, so, I wrote another poem. I've never been to a beautiful island where the waters are blue and the sun is golden. I've never built a sand castle in pink sand, nor have I found a sand dollar yet... and yes, my poems still rhyme... =)

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Vision

Bathing in the sun's rays
Watching the palm trees sway
Touring the island and its blue sea
We both wonder where we'll be

From the leaves of the palm tree
I make you a crown
On the dried sea grass
You ask me to lay down.

You write me a little note
"I love you", it read
I fold it into a boat
Watching the words spread

I build you a sand castle
Telling you it's our future home
You carve a moat around it
Wanting me for your own

I find you a sand dollar
"It's like you", I said
"Handsome, smooth, and strong..."
You hand me a seashell
"Listen -- it sings our song"

"This is like a dream"
A dream...
...in a golden sunset

"This is like a dream"
A mirage...
... chased false love with regret


-- Sparkyx, April 23rd, 2007, 3:34pm

Story Ending

I am an author...

The book that I'm writing is full of drama, excitement, exhilaration, and chapters that are not so great. So, I won't blame you for scanning through those chapters, because they are too boring to read, even for me. I've never won a Pulitzer Prize for my writing, nor have I successfully published anything, but my story gets told and read by a small number of people everyday. I am the author, editor, and publisher of my own book. I yet have to turn a profit, but I feel rich.

I have a beginning to my story, yet no ending... yet. I actually don't get to write the ending. The ending writes itself as the book progresses... sort of like those "determine your own ending" story books we read as kids; except, the endings are limited and there are wild cards along the way. I don't know how many volumes I will write, nor do I know where the story goes.

In many ways, my book is like the 32 books that were written by the Virginia Tech victims. Each book had it's own unique beginning, but a common ending... an ending that was written by one author, Cho Seung-Hui. Ironically... Cho got to write his own ending too. Thirty-three story endings... one common author... one common ending... death.

To reflect on that last sentence... I guess we all have a common ending too... in a way... death. The most certain and basic story ending.

Just because we all have a common ending doesn't mean we should slack off and not make the story interesting, but it does bring a different light into the story. We all need to make our story interesting to tell because our common endings are boring and nor do we get to write it in most cases...

It is sad to see 32 inspiring stories stop short so quickly... 32 aspiring minds... full of story writing potentials... 33 sad stories... 1 common ending.

I wish Cho's dark plays where never written. I wish Cho wrote his story differently. Alas, once a story is in print, it is what it is.

Today, I will ask for an extension on my book... I have many chapters to write. I am an author, an editor, and a publisher of my own book. I do not want to win the Pulitzer Prize anytime soon either. I want my living story to touch many lives before it sets in print.

Today I write... and I plan to write tomorrow... and the day after... only He knows the ending to my story... a story drafted by His design... a story written by me... a paragraph shared with you... a common story ending shared by all of us -- brings us together in a full circle... the circle of life.

"May God be with the victims and the victims' families during this difficult time in our country's living history. Today I ask for the unattainable -- simply -- peace."

A face to the story

Missing Sly

I'm missing Sylvester a lot these two weeks... I guess all the pet food recall is making me think of him... seeing photos of cats that resemble him in the news articles also make me think of him more.

Can you blame me? Sylvester suffered from kidney failure last October and had to be put to sleep. I keep on checking the ever expanding recall list from Menu Foods every time I see an updated article... I guess I'm trying to find reason for his untimely death. I always thought he would be around for at least another few years...

"Grandpa"... that's what my roommates and I sometimes refer to him as. :) "Grandpa" did this today... "grandpa" was being moody... "grandpa" was locked outside in the yard by mistake... "grandpa" was attacked by an alley cat... and etc...

I found myself petting "grandpa's" fur over the weekend. I kept a ball of his fur that was left behind in his brush, a tooth that fell off due to old age, and 4 clippings of his whiskers before he was euthanized. I almost forgot how soft his fur actually was.

I miss you Sylvester.

Uno Chino

When does a Chino like me equal a Mexicano and 10 Indians? It really isn't a trick question... It is when you work for a company named after a horror-scope sign and based in the New York Stock Exchange.

Over a year ago, my horror-scope signed company got the boot by the NYSE. NYSE was going through the Archipelgo merger and most recently the EuroNext merger. As a result, the new company, NYSE Group, which is an IPO'ed company now, is managing their resources more tightly... namely, reducing headcount within NYSE Group and SIAC and lopping off consultant's heads without announcement. Over 65% of my company's revenue comes from the NYSE Group... needless to say... we faced our own reduction in headcount. Thirty percent of my horror-scope company either got laid off or left due to reduction in salary and no raises... let alone pay increases or bonuses... oh... we where asked to contribute to our health insurance plans too... it was once a company benefit since we don't get company 401k contributions... THAT leads to another thing... my HORROR-scope company is withholding our 401k money in their own bank accounts each month before depositing it into OUR accounts the following month... What does this translate into?? Well... less money for us and interest payment for them on our money!! Not to mention... I don't even know if they still owe me money, since we recently switched payroll companies and THAT left us in the cold when it came to pay stubs... :( Oh, BTW... according to an HR friend of mine, my company is committing a crime by not depositing our 401k money within a 7 day period after withdrawal!!!

Anyway... over the past year or so... a bunch of Indian heads started rolling here at the Exchange... needless to say... my Mexican coworker and I picked up the slack and did a TON of technical support for other departments that lopped off the Indians' heads... sigh... now, my Mexican coworker is crossing the border... to Canada. This Friday is his last day and I will officially do the work of all those Indians plus one Mexicano. :( *sniff*

I'm overworked... under paid... got scolded at for not checking my company's email account... and I was asked NOT to take vacation time off until the Mexicano comes back to the States - if he comes back. :(

I need to find myself a sugardaddy or a new job... whichever comes my way first... *sob* I haven't been able to sleep well the past 5 days... not sure if it's stress related or partially I was afraid to sleep alone at the studio to begin with. I was hunting all over my studio for a night light and when I found one... no light bulb!

In the light of all this... I guess I have job security. :) If I were to leave now... no one at NYSE would be able to handle ANY of the Notes Domino applications that I now oversee... how interesting... I can single handedly bring down several of NYSE.com's webpages and cause a bunch of SEC Regulatory violations... not to mention the fact that I would also be capable of purging all of NYSE's visiting companies' information for the next few years! But, of course... if I do any of this, I'll be plastered all over the news within 24 hours... LOL...!! Sigh... I may not like working for my HORROR-scope company, but I have nothing against NYSE. I actually like working at NYSE... it's my company's treatment of its employees that I'm concerned about. We are losing a lot of good talent.

Anyway... if any of my co-workers find this page by accident... no need to be alarmed... I won't be bringing down any servers and etc... relax... don't be so anal... can't I just vent?

DiFara's Pizza

Forty-seven years of pizza making... unchanged... just as inefficient as it probably was on day one. "It's worth the wait", reads an article...

On the recommendation of a co-worker of mine, I visited DiFara's Pizza on the corner of Ave. J and East 16th Street in my new neighborhood. He told me that it was the best pizza that he had EVER had. Out of curiosity, I wanted to taste how good this pizza really was, since I grew up in a mostly Italian neighborhood and they know pizza. Living in a 85% Jewish neighborhood... pizza hunting on a Friday was pointless anyway. Every Jewish owned pizza place was closed... except for DiFara's.

The moment I stepped into DiFara's, I new I was in trouble... the line was wrapping around the dilapidated green colored dining area. Everyone was quiet, watching an old man in his 70's create his masterpiece one pie at a time. I stood in line for my pie among all the other repeat addicts. The old man's daughter, in her 50's, asked me what I wanted. "I want a regular pie to go, please."

After placing my order, I stood in line patiently watching the pizza addicts hungrily thanking the old man's daughter as she handed them their pies. I noticed that all the addicts ordered their pies to stay instead of to go. The seating was scarce... there were about 5 tables, seating about 15 to 20 at most.

An Americanized dark skinned Indian looking guy walked up to the counter and asked the old man's daughter, "Where do you get your hot peppers?"

"Around 60 something street, about 10 minutes away from here" and she named the store. I was like, "What's up with that?"

"We want to go pick up the hot peppers for you."

"Don't worry about it. They are suppose to make the delivery soon."

About 5 minutes later, with the help of an Internet enabled phone and a phone call to the store, "Ma'am, the store is delivering the hot peppers right away."

"Really?"

"We called and asked for immediate delivery."

I turned my head back and stared in disbelief.

*ring* *ring*

"Hello? DiFara's. Yes. We are open today. You can take the Q train to Avenue J. Okay. Goodbye."

I was further in awe... this was no neighborhood pizza place...

I had stood in line waiting patiently for about 20 minutes by now... getting weaker in the knees as I watched pies after pies pass in front of me to the eager addicts waiting at the tables for their fix.

"Excuse me, how much longer do I have to wait?"

"Oh, there are many more pies before you." She started flipping through her low-tech notepad order tracking system and declared to me, "You would have to wait at least another 30 minutes."

My now tired face turned into a sad puppy dog face... in disbelief... I turned to my friend who was about to die on me from hunger and I asked him, "Do you still want to wait?"

"No. I really can't wait anymore. I won't make it." I was thinking... "Rats (foreshadowing)... if he dies on me, who's gonna help me paint after lunch?"

"So.. do you wanna leave and have Vietnamese?"

"Yeah. Let's just go."

So... as I was slurping my pho at the Viet place and feeling the warm soup in my now shrivelled up stomach... I was still in awe. "One pizza at a time... MY GAWD... how insane is that?"

So, back at work, I went over to the same co-worker who recommended the place and told him the story. He said, "Isn't it just a show? People just go there to watch him make the pizza. It's crazy. By the way, they have had so many health violations in the past. There where reports of RATS and stuff."

Oh great... not only did I wait in line for a deformed-funny-looking pizza that I never got to taste... I was waiting in line for a stomach virus and "raisins" in my pizza too. Don't you just love hearing half the story?

Old Man DeMarco in Denial
Mice Poopy
One Slice - Free Droppings!
I know this Place!

Mr. Blume

When I grow up, I want to be a Mr. Blume... well, grow older that is.

Mr. Blume is a retired teacher that teaches as a substitute teacher in Long Island. He teaches more than just the subjects, he draws on his personal experiences, all 81 years of it, and tells a story instead. Throughout history, history has been told via story telling... the simplest form of education. I still remember the stories that my grandfather and my late grandmother told of WWII and the struggles that my ancestors faced when they first arrived at Ellis Island. It's a bit of history with a personal insight on the side.

I want to retire early from the corporate world and to teach in our public school system. I don't know what subject I want to teach, but I just know that I want to teach. I've always had this desire to become a teacher, but my desire of wanting to live the better part of the "American Dream" steered me towards the corporate world. At first, one may think that I had betrayed myself by not following my dream of teaching, but I beg to differ. I believe I have a lot more to offer as a teacher AFTER being a part of the corporate world. I don't believe in becoming a teacher right after graduating from school yourself. Where is the "real" world experience? Sure, if you want to preach from a textbook, I guess you will do just fine... but, what about the more tangible aspect of the subject matter?

When I was in school, many many moons ago... I always wondered where the practicality is for everything that I learned. I do believe that teaching involves more than just sharing the subject matter in the literal terms, but also should involve the living aspect of it.

Other than teaching the living aspect of a subject, I also believe in straying away from the subject matter altogether to just focus on a small aspect of life itself. Students after all are not just learning beings, but they represent a glimpse of our future society. Give them the right tools and armed with a learned-past, they have a greater potential to succeed and to enjoy life. After all, what is life without proper enjoyment of it?

I also believe that teachers should never treat students as sponges, but instead as learning equals; after all, the day we stop learning is the day we die. Their minds should be challenged and their beliefs should be challenged.

Becoming a preacher of textbooks is easy... becoming a bridge for a child to the real world is the challenge.

I guess I want to take back what I said earlier... I don't have the desire to become a teacher, but to become a bridge for our children... it serves a better purpose.


NY Times Article on Mr. Blume